I should be in AWE! Not in blah...

Right now things are going really great in my life--in truth, they couldn't be better! (Why do I always feel the need to cross my fingers when I say that?)

My marriage relationship is phenomenal (PRAISE!) and my kids are all doing well. My husband’s job is stable. There are no financial struggles right now and everyone is healthy!

Personally, God keeps throwing me little these bones--nothing gigantic, but just enough to keep me encouraged enough to continue on this particular path that I've been going down for the past year or so and I am grateful for that.

However, for some odd reason, I have this weird case of the blahs right now. I can't really explain it or put my finger on why. I certainly don't like feeling this way, especially considering all the blessings that are raining down in my life right now...nevertheless, it's there.

What's up with that?
It doesn't make any sense considering my life right now...
I should be in AWE!!
Not in blah...

My self critical nature keeps pointing at me accusingly,

"Shame on you!
There’s so much good in you life and yet you’re feeling blah!
What’s wrong with you?
Do not share this with anyone—it’s embarrassing!
Keep this on the down-low."

But I've learned that trying to hide it or pretend something isn't there is just silly because God know the secrets of the heart (Psalm 44:21). Since I can't hide it from Him, why bother trying to hide it at all?

There's no denying it's there
whether or not it's right or good,
unfortunately, it's very real.

As I began to mull over this awkward feeling of not having my emotions match my circumstances—I began to see a theme in God’s word where others struggled with this as well. I am not alone!! And I’m not weird (well…at least not in THIS area!)

“A sure faith cannot expect to be free of occasional doubt or anxiety. Believers have a perpetual conflict with their own diffidence (hesitancy, reserve, timidity)…”—Reverend Charles Hodge (1797-1878)

Psalms 42:5-6 (message) “Why are you down in the dumps, dear soul? Why are you crying the blues? Fix my eyes on God— soon I'll be praising again. He puts a smile on my face. He's my God. When my soul is in the dumps, I rehearse everything I know of you…”

I read that quote and verse and I am instantly helped. It reminds me that having the blahs (or blues as this verse says) is temporary and soon I will be praising again!

And it gives me something constructive to do when I am down in the dumps—rehearse everything I know about the Lord...

*He is my strength, my song, my salvation ~ Exodus 15:2
*The Lord is abounding in Love ~ Numbers 14:18
*He is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer ~ 2 Sam. 2:22
*The Lord is just ~ 2 Chronicles 12:6
*The joy of the Lord is my strength ~ Nehemiah 8:10
*The Lord is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble ~ Psalm 9:9
*The Lord is righteous ~ Psalms 11:7
*The Lord is my shepherd ~ Psalm 23:1
*The Lord is my light and my salvation ~ Psalm 27:1
*The Lord is powerful and majestic ~ Psalm 29:4
*The Lord is the one who sustains me ~ Psalms 54:4
*The Lord is compassionate and gracious ~ Psalms 111:4
*The Lord is our judge, our lawgiver, our king ~ Isaiah 33:22
*The Lord is my helper ~ Hebrews 13:6

Then after I’ve reviewed some of the things I know about my Lord…almost like magic…I start to feel my blah changing into AWE!

"but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." ~ Isaiah 40:31

I can already start to feel my spirit rising!! Soon I'll be soaring!